Traumatized
by Princess KoKo
Summary: After Selphie is sexually attacked, she becomes tramautized, and her friends try to help her through it. Plz R&R!
1. Getting Away

**Getting Away**

Disclaimer- I do not own Final Fantasy VIII. It belongs to Square NOT me!

What if he's still coming? Selphie thought worriedly as she stumbled along in the hallway that led to the dorms. She had to get to Rinoa's dorm before that guy came back. Getting away the first time had been hard enough, she didn't think that she could do it again. Finally! Thought Selphie when she had finally arrived at Rinoa's dorm. She reached up and knocked on the door. Please be in! Selphie prayed to God as she held her breath waiting for someone to answer the door. She knocked again. Still no answer. Selphie fell to her knees in front of Rinoa's door and started to cry. That's when Rinoa opened the door. "Sorry I took so long to answer. I was in the shower and-" Rinoa finally noticed that Selphie was on the floor crying in a very ripped dress. "Selphie! Are you ok? Come inside." Rinoa reached down to help Selphie up but Selphie flinched away from her hand and got up herself.

"Please don't touch me." Selphie whispered in a broken voice. Rinoa nodded and opened the door for Selphie to come in. Once inside Selphie sat down on Rinoa's couch and dropped her head into her hands.

"Selphie what happened?" Rinoa asked.

"I was walking down by the stage in the quad when someone grabbed me and-" Selphie couldn't finish her sentence.

"Someone raped you?" Riona cried out.

"NO!" Selphie yelled. "Sorry. He didn't rape me. He tried to. I just got away."

"Oh. Do you know who it was?"

"If I knew who it was I would be out there with you guys kicking his ass. God!" Selphie yelled again. "Sorry again. I'm just a little...touchy now."

"It's ok." Rinoa reassured her. "That's natural. Is it ok if I call Squall and Zell. They can search around and see if can find out anything."

"Ya, whatever." Selphie said as she layed down and then curled up into a ball. Rinoa walked over to her phone and dialed Squall's number first.

"Hello." Squall answered sleepily. He was asleep! It was only 10:30. Thought Rinoa.

"Hey, I need your help." Rinoa said.

"Sure, anything." Squall replied sounding more awake now.

"I have a problem-"

"I'll be there in three secs. Don't move an inch." Squall said hurriedly and hung up the phone. Ok thought Rinoa. That was odd. Next she called Zell.

"Yello?" Zell answered.

"Hey. We have a problem." Rinoa then told him the whole story and Zell said he would be over right away. Rinoa then hung up the phone and walked towards Selphie. "How are you feeling?" She asked Selphie. Not wanting to talk about, Selphie avoided the question with another.

"Are they coming?" That's when they heard knocking on the door.

"Does that answer your question?" Rinoa asked as she walked to the door and opened it. Squall stood there looking at her.

"Are you ok? What's wrong?" He asked really fast.

"I'm fine it's Selphie. She was almost-" Rinoa was cut off by Zell's barging into the room.

"Selphie? Are you ok?" He ran to her and tried to touch her but she shrieked and moved away from his hand as quickly as possible.

"She's not ready to be touched yet." Rinoa told Zell gently. "Anyway, we thought that you two may be able to find something out. You know, go looking around."

"Does she know who her attacker was?" Squall asked. Rinoa shook her head as Selphie just cowered on the corner of the couch. "Then I'm afraid that there is nothing much that we can do." Squall said sadly. "We'll just have to watch her." Rinoa nodded.

"You can stay at my place if you want." Zell offered her. He could tell that she was about to say no so he added, "I'll keep watch for you. I want to protect you." Selphie sat quietly for a minute and then finally nodded. "Good. Come on." Zell said as he waited for her to walk out the door and then he followed.

"Oh Squall." Rinoa said worriedly. "Do you think she'll be ok?" Squall took Rinoa into his arms and put his chin on top of her head.

"Zell will help her get through it."

"I know but she's really traumatized and Squall..." Squall looked down at Rinoa eyes and realized the truth that she hadn't said yet. "I'm scared." She whispered. Squal gently stroked her hair.

"Don't be. Everyone knows what I would do to them if they ever even looked at you in a wrong way." Squall said trying to be reassuring. He could tell she was still scared though because she began trembling in his arms. "Come stay with me tonight."

"But Selphie-"

"Will be fine. She's with Zell. Come on." Squall said as he picked her up and walked out her door. "Where's your key?"

"In my pocket." Rinoa whispered and pulled it out. She then gave Squall the key who in turn locked her dorm room door. He then carried her off to his own room.

"All right, here we are." Zell said as he quickly unlocked his dorm door. He looked at Selphie and realized that she was hesitating. Why? He would never hurt. Didn't she know that? Zell gently pressed his hand to her back trying to urge her inside but she just screamed and dropped to the floor. What the hell was he going to do? "I'm sorry Selphie. I'm just trying to help. You need to go inside." Zell whispered to her from a good distance. She suddenly got up and walked inside his room.

"I know...I'm just...I can't..." Selphie said and she began to cry. She sat down on his bed and let her tears fall and Zell wished that he could comfort her.

"You need some clothes. I'll go to your room and-"

"NO! Please don't leave me..." Selphie whimpered. Zell nodded and looked through his drawers to see if he had anything that was clean. He came up with a long white t-shirt he used to wear to bed.

"I won't leave you. Now put this on." He said throwing the white shirt to her.

"Thanks." She whispered but she didn't move.

"What are you waiting for?" Zell asked, clearly confused as to why she wasn't putting the shirt on right away.

"For you to turn around."

"Oh. Sorry." Zell said and quickly turned. He had forgotten that she would actually have to get semi-naked. He heard her rustling around behind him and he was really tempted to turn. He couldn't do that though and he was disgusted with himself for even thinking it.

"I'm done." Selphie said and Zell turned around. She nearly took his breath away when he turned. The white shirt hugged her curves sweetly and her hair was all mussed up from pulling the shirt on over her head. She had never looked more beautiful to him. "Zell...Earth to Zell." Selphie said and suddenly he snapped back to attention.

"Uh yea?" That was embarassing thought Zell.

"I just realized I need to take a shower." Selphie said quietly. Why was God making this so hard for him wondered Zell.

"Uh sure. The shower is through that door." Zell said relatively calmly. He walked around his room looking for a clean towel. YES! He thought. Found one. He opened the door to the bathroom for her and handed her the towel. "There's soap and shampoo there but that's about all I have. If you want your stuff I can go and get it for you tommorow."

"You mean I can stay?" Selphie asked, her eyes wide.

"For as long as you like." Zell answered with a gentle smile.

"Thanks Zell. I don't know what I would do without you."

"No prob." He said and walked to his couch to watch tv.

"Are you sure she'll be ok?" Rinoa asked for the zillionth time.

"I'm positive." Squall replied as he had all zillion times before. "Now what do you want to eat. I have half a cold pizza me and Zell ate. One can of flat pop. A half eaten sandwich and some left over stroganoff." Rinoa grimaced at what he offered.

"Don't you have some cold cuts and bread?" She asked. Squall just shook his head no. "Then I think we should skip eating. I would suggest going to the caf but it closes at 9:30."

"Who needs food. We'll be fine for now. I'll take you to the caf tommorow morning and buy you the biggest stack of pancakes ever." Squall said and Rinoa smiled. He knew that would help her get her mind of Selphie. "Come here." He said and she got up off the couch and walked over to him. He grabbed her waist and heaved her closer until they were against each other. "Kiss me." He said. He leaned down and she rose up until their lips met. He pressed her against him harder knowing that she could feel that he was aroused but not really caring. He opened her lips with his tongue and then plunged in to enjoy the warmth of her mouth.

"Squall...Should we be doing this?" She whispered against his mouth.

"I'm going to take your words and throw them back at you. Stop thinking!" He whispered back and then went back to kissing her. He then lowered his head and started kissing her throat.

"Squall..."

"All right. I'll control myself. Come on and get into bed." Rinoa gave him a funny look. "I'll just hold you, I promise." Rinoa believed him and quickly grabbed stripped out of her clothes and pulled on one of his white shirts. She then climbed into his bed. He stripped off everything but his boxers and climbed in beside her, gently wrapping his arm around her waist. "Good night." He whispered into her hair.

"G'night."

Selphie stood in the shower letting the water hit her. Why was she so afraid of Zell's touch? It's not like he was the one who tried to rape her. Suddenly a flashing image went by and she seen the man grabbing at her dress. Selphie opened her eyes wide and prayed to God that she would never have to go through that again. She quickly got out of teh shower and dried off. She then pulled on a pair of Zell's boxers that he had given her and her shirt. The boxers were really loose so she took the hair tie that she kept around her wrist and tied them in a big pony tail on the side until they were tight enough. She then pulled Zell's brush through her hair and finger brushed her teeth. She opened the door and found that Zell had fallen asleep in front of the tv. She smiled and then turned to climb into his bed. "Good night Zell." She whispered before falling asleep.


	2. The Dream

**The dream**

Disclaimer- I don't own Final Fantasy VIII, it belongs to Square NOT me.

_Selphie walked happily around the stage deciding that it was definitely ready for the concert she was going to have. She bent down to pick up a piece of fabric that had fallen off the curtain when suddenly someone grabbed her from behind and covered her mouth. Thinking that it was Zell playing a trick she didn't try and get away very hard. But when she was spun around, she realized that it wasn't Zell. The man then startign grabbing at her and she tried to get away but he was about 11 and a half inches taller then her and a lot stronger. She tried kicking but he caught her leg and tried to yank her dress off. The only thing he succeeded in doing was ripping one of the straps. Selphie tried to scream but the man's huge hand was over her mouth. She then saw a sudden flash of blue eyes. Who was it? She thought as she continued to try and kick and punch him. "Selphie wake up!" The man screamed as he shook her._

_"NO! Let me go!" Selphie cried._

Suddenly, Selphie shot up from her nightmare and she realized that it had been Zell who was shaking her and trying to get her up. She was covered in sweat and Zell's shirt that she was wearing had become see through. She tried to cover her chest with her hands but didn't really succeed. Zell turned from her and said,

"I have another shirt in my bottom drawer." Selphie nodded then remembered he couldn't see her.

"Thanks." She whispered as she reached down to the drawer and pulled out the new shirt. She then pulled off the sweaty one and pulled on the new one. "You can look."

"Are you ok? You must have had a bad dream because you were screaming and sweating." Zell said.

"It replayed in my dream. I can't see who it is though. I can't see who did it!" Selphie cried and then dropped her head in her hands and sobbed. Her little shoulders heaved with her tears and Zell longed to hold her and tell her that everything will be ok.

"Selphie...Please let me help you." He whispered and she looked up. Her cheeks were red and stained with tears. Her lower lip was trembling and she looked like she would burst out crying again at any moment. "Please...I just want to help." Selphie finally nodded. Zell sat on the bed beside her and open his arms, letting her do this at her own pace. She slowly leaned towards him, but just when his arms would have closed around her she jumped back.

"I can't do it." She whispered, then got up and ran into his bathroom, locking the door behind her.

"Damn it." Zell muttered. Why couldn't she see that he only wanted to help? Why couldn't she trust him?

"Squall! GET UP!" Rinoa yelled into Squall's ear. After many attempts he still hadn't waken up.

"I don't want to." Squall whinned as he rolled onto his back. He opened one eye to look at her and then grabbed her waist and pulled her across the bed until she was sitting on top of him, straddling him.

"What are you doing!" Rinoa cried out. "You promised me a huge stack of pancakes."

"I know. I will...Later." Squall replied as he pulled her down until her mouth met his. He pressed her body along his and kissed her harder.

"Squall..." Rinoa moaned as he pulled his white shirt off her. She then rolled so that she was laying beside him instead of leaning down from on top of him. She then ran her hands up and down his chest which made him groan and start to pull down her panties. When she was finally naked in front of him he bent his head and put moist, little kisses down her neck until he reached her breasts. Rinoa whimpered and Squall took that as his cue. He took one of her nipples into his mouth and played with it with his tongue. "Squall...Please..." Rinoa whimpered some more.He stopped only long enough to put a condom on then he twisted until she was underneath him and he looked down into her eyes.

"Rinoa..." She pulled his head down until his lips met hers and while they were kissing Squall entered her. She cried out against his lips and he swallowed the sound. Rinoa met Squall thrust for thrust until she climaxed. While her pleasure rippled through her body Squall's own pleasure exploded through him. Squall gently rolled off Rinoa and layed beside her, gathing her into his arms.

"So when are we going to get my pancakes?"

Why was she having so much trouble letting Zell touch her? Wondered Selphie. He was such a great guy and she'd liked him since they met. Why now was it so hard to do what she had always wanted to do? Selphie swung her feet back and forth as she sat on the counter in Zell's bathroom. And what about her dream? Selphie tried hard to remember what had happened exactly in her dream but she couldn't. She knew that there was something important that she should remember but she didn't. It was really starting to frustrate her. Then someone was knocking on the door. "Yes?" Selphie asked hesitantly.

"Are you hungry? Want me to take you down to the caf for breakfast?" Zell asked. Selphie thought for a while and then decided that she would like some breakfast.

"Zell?"

"Ya?"

"I would love some breakfast." Selphie said as she unlocked the bathroom door, ran out and grabbed a pair of Zell's pants and her bra, then ran back into the bathroom to change. She walked out when she was finally done and Zell barely held back a chuckle. He was 3 and a half inches taller then Selphie making his pants look really funny on her. She had them rolled up at the bottom. Also, Zell was a lot wider, do to his muscle, then she was. Her tiny waist had trouble holding up his pants even with a belt on. To top it all off she was wearing his long t-shirt which reached her knees. Selphie looked up to see him staring and giggled herself. "It's a look." She said before walking towards the door and opening. "Hurry up."

"Oh thank God." Zell said as he ran after her. "I'm starving." Zell and Selphie walked in silence until they got to the caf and looked around. Seifer sat at one tabl with Quistis on his lap, arguing about who gets the last home fry. Then at another table Squall and Rinoa sat together eating an enormous stack of pancakes. All the couples made Zell wish that he had a girlfriend. He looked at Selphie and that just made him wish harder. He wanted Selphie to be his girlfriend. Selphie walked over to Squall and Rinoa's table and sat down opposite them.

"Hey guys!" She said over brightly with a huge fake smile plastered on her face.

"H-hey Selphie. Are you ok?" Rinoa asked gently.

"Sure. Never better!" Selphie replied with another fake smile. "How about getting me some bacon and eggs Zell?"


	3. Learning to touch again

**Traumatized**

**Learning to touch again**

"Why do you think Selphie was acting so weird in the caf today? She looked like she got major botox done and now she can't do anything but smile." Seifer asked Quistis as they sat in his room and drank pop after coming back from the cafeteria.

"You're so mean Seifer. Maybe she was having a bad day and trying to cover it up or maybe..."

"Maybe what?" Seifer asks excitedly. Quistis had gotten his curiosity picked.

"Maybe he helped her get past her barrier." Quistis said mart of factly.

"Past her what? She had a problem?" Seifer was so confused.

"No. He popped her cherry."

"Oh! She's mad at him for ruining her sundae and is trying to act like she isn't." Seifer said, thinking that he had got it.

"No, you idiot. You're so pathetic." Quistis was getting really exasperated.

"THEN WHAT IS IT!" Seifer started yelling.

"THEY HAD SEX!" Quistis yelled back. "HE TOOK HER VIRGINITY! GET IT NOW!"

"Not really." Seifer admitted. "Why would she act different because of that? I didn't act any different."

"My God Seifer. It's different for girls. It's painful and special all at the same time and if the guy really doesn't care in the end, it hurts that much more."

"I see. Maybe we should put this too the test. I'll go find some virgin girl, sleep with her, then let you know what happened." Seifer said.

"You're dumb." Quistis said to his stupid comment. Seifer reached and gently tugged Quistis's head down to meet his. He started to kiss her and Quistis went with it, kissing him back. After a while Seifer reached up her shirt and Quistis moaned when his hand covered her breast. He gently played with her nipples through her bra but that wasn't enough for Seifer. He let his other hand drop to her pants when Quistis suddenly jerked back. "What?" Seifer asked.

"Don't Seifer! I already told you that I wasn't ready to take that step in our relationship." Quistis cried as she ran out his door and slammed it behind her. Seifer was pissed that she had left like that so he picked up one of the empty glasses that had had pop in it and threw it against the wall.

"Damn it!" Seifer yelled as he watched the glass shatter into millions of pieces.

"Well Selphie looked happier this morning." Squall commented as he drank a pop.

"No she didn't!" Rinoa replied. "She looked like she was faking it for everyone's sake." Rinoa picked up her own glass of pop and drank some.

"Whatever. At least she's trying." Squall said and got up to go to the fridge.

"Her faking it is not a good thing." Rinoa said quietly.

"Don't go down this road again Rinoa. She'll be fine. She's just picking her own way to deal. It's not up to you to decide whether it's right or wrong." Squall said.

"Ya, ya. I know. I'm going to take a shower." Squall raised an eyebrow at that.

"Want some company?" He asked innocently.

"No thanks. If I invite you to come in the shower with me I'll never even get in. I'll just get my top off and we'll be having sex on the counter." Squall smiled at that.

"What can I say? When your as beautiful as you are you can't expect me to be able to resist."

"Flatterer." Rinoa through over her shoulder as she went in the bathroom locking the door behind her.

"Awww." Squall faked a groan. "Why do you have to be like that?"

Zell looked around his room and realized that he was really bored. Selphie was in the shower and he had nothing to do. So he decided to pick up the phone and call Squall. Hopefully he wasn't doing stuff with Rinoa. The phone rang three times when finally Squall picked up. "Hey Squall." Zell said cheerfully.

"Hey Zell. What's up?"

"Nothing much. I was just calling to let you know that Selphie had a really bad dream last night. She seems to be reliving the night over and over again in her head. I'm getting kind of worried."

"I'll tell you exactly what I told Rinoa. Don't worry about it. She'll be fine. This is just her way of dealing with it. Where is she by the way?"

"She's in the shower. Thanks man."

"No prob Zell. Listen I got to go. Fill me in on more later."

"Sure bye." Zell hung up the phone as the conversation ended. He sat down on his couch trying to think of something to do when he heard a scream and Selphie came running out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around her. Zell looked up to see that she was crying, he then jumped up off the couch and headed towards her.

"Selphie, what's wrong?" Zell asked as gently as he could. She looked up at him with huge, scared eyes.

"I h-h-had a f-flash-flashback. I seen...I seen it all in my head." She stuttered. Zell automatically reached out to brush her tears away. Selphie flinched as his hand came near but she didn't move away this time. Zell was encouraged by that so he kept moving his hand forward until he gently brushed his thumb across her cheek, wiping away her tears.

"It's ok Selphie. I'll never let him do that to you again. I promise." Selphie nodded to that and went back in the bathroom to change into her pajama pants and a tank top, which they had picked up from her place on the way back from the cafeteria. After changing Selphie sat down on Zell's bed cross legged.

"Zell?"

"Ya, Selphie?"

"Can you please talk about something to help me get my mind off...this." She asked quietly.

"Uh, sure. Um..." Zell really had no idea what to say that would ease her mind. "I have never had a steady girlfriend before. My longest relationship lasted one month." Selphie's eyes widened at that.

"That's not very long. All right well I guess it's my turn to admit something. Uh...I'm still a virgin." Selphie said the last part very quietly.

"So am I." Zell replied and Selphie gasped. Zell was a virgin? Thought Selphie. She thought for sure that he had already done it with many girls seeing as he was so good looking.

"Wow."

"Sad, I know."

"It's not sad Zell. That's beautiful. You're waiting for that special someone. I think that's very sexy." Selphie admitted. "Anyway I guess it's my turn again. To be completely honest, I have never even had a real kiss before." Zell looked into Selphie's eyes realizing that he wanted to be her first real kiss. He wanted to be everything for her. With that only thought in mind he leaned forward and captured her lips with his own. Selphie was surprised that Zell had made such a bold move on her but she didn't stop him, she didn't want to stop him. She pressed her lips against his harder, then he gently opened her mouth with the tip of his tongue making her gasp.

"It's ok." Zell whispered against her mouth before continuing with the kiss. Selphie loved the way it felt, and loved how patient Zell was being with her. Suddenly though all the memories came back. All the feelings of almost getting raped. Flashing blue eyes. The strength and the tearing sound her dress made. Selphie jumped back from Zell with the fear in her eyes all over again.

"I'm sorry." Selphie whispered as she put her hand over her mouth and her eyes filled with tears.

"It's ok Selphie." He said gently as he gently reached out to stroke her cheek. She jumped back slightly but he still stroked her cheek gently. "It's probably a good idea for you to go to bed now." Zell said and Selphie nodded. She gently climbed into his bed and Zell pulled the sheets over her and tucked her in. He then leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Good night, Selphie."

"Good night."


	4. The bar on the docks

**Traumatized**

**The Bar On The Docks**

Seifer got into the elevator and pressed the button that would take him to the main floor. He had decided that, since Quistis wasn't going to let him get rid of his sexual tension, he would get rid of his other tension in the training center. Once he got to the main floor and looked over at the training center though, he changed his mind. Quistis stood there talking to some guy that Seifer didn't know. It looked like they were going to train together. Seifer didn't like that at all. He was going to go show that guy who Quistis's boyfriend is. Seifer hopped down from the platform that the elevator was on and, by some miracle, actually landed on the main floor instead of in the water. He sauntered over to where the two were talking and Quistis looked up...And smiled! Clearly, she had no idea that he was still mad about last night. "Hey Seifer!" She said with a wave as he got closer. The guy she was talking to looked up and then ran into the training center.

"Who was that?" Seifer asked nastily.

"Jealous?" Quistis asked sweetly.

"NO!" Seifer snapped. "I don't get jealous. I was just wondering."

"Don't be such a grouch, Seifer. You know that I only care for you." Quistis said, looking itno his eyes to try and prove that she was sincere. Seifer just snorted.

"Ya, that's why you won't sleep with me!"

"That has nothing to do with this! Why are you being so difficult about it? If you really cared for me you would respect my decision!" Quistis yelled at him. "If you want sex that bad why don't you go sleep with one of the whores that goes to the garden. I'm sure they'll jump into bed with you willingly enough. Go on Seifer. What are you waiting for? Go have your kinky-" Seifer turned on his heel and stormed out of the garden, pushing people out of his way as he headed for the front entrance. Quistis just stared at where he had been, a few moments ago, with tears in her eyes. "Why do you do this to me?" Quistis whispered to no one in particular. She then got a hold of herself and walked into the training center. She would still train with Jimmy.

"SQUALL!" Rinoa yelled through the bathroom door as he took a shower.

"WHAT?" He yelled back over the spray of water.

"I'M GOING SHOPPING FOR GROCERIES! YOU HAVE NOTHING TO EAT OR DRINK IN YOUR FRIDGE!" Rinoa cried, picking up her purse as she said it.

"WHAT?" Oh nevermind, thought Rinoa. She'll just leave him a note. Rinoa quickly grabbed the pad of paper that was on the counter and the pen that was on the coffee table. She then quickly wrote that she was going to the grocery story in Balamb. She'd back as soon as she could. After writing love Rinoa she place it in front of the bathroom door and then quickly ran out of the dorm. She walked towards the parking lot, but once she got inside she was disapointed. All the student rental cars were gone. Not even Seifer's car was there. Darn it, she thought as she came to the conclusion that she was going to have to walk to the store and walk back with all of the groceries.

"Oh well, that's life." Rinoa muttered as she went back to the main hall. Here we go, she thought as she walked out the main entrance.

Seifer walked into the new bar on Balamb's docks. It was called, oddly enough, The Bar On The Docks. Seifer walked in and was surprised to see that there was only one other person in the bar. It was some old, drunk guy who was watching a sports channel. Seifer looked down at his watch and then realized why. It was only 10:00 am. Not too early to get drunk, Seifer thought as he sat down in a window seat. He raised his arm to signal the waitress. "How can I help you sir?" She asked politely.

"Two beers. No make it four." Seifer said, changing his mind. He realized that he would have to drink a lot to forget about Quistis.

"Yes sir." She replied and soon came back with his four beers. Seifer quickly downed all four of them and oredered another four more. This was the only time that Seifer hated being as big as he was. Since he was 6'2" it took a lot more beer to get him drunk then Squall, who's only a measle 5'8". HA! Seifer thought. Squall was so short. But next to Zell he looked like a giant. Zell is only 5'5". He the same height as a lot of women. Seifer started to laugh out loud and the drunk man turned and gave him a nasty look.

"Do you want to make something of it old man?" Seifer demanded. The old man just ignored him and went back to watching his game. Seifer leaned his head against the window and ordered another four beers as he had finished the first eight. That's when he saw Rinoa walking down the stairs. She looked up and saw him, then headed for the bar. "That's right." Seifer said. "I'm irres..Irre-ssissble." Seifer started to slur. Rinoa walked into the bar and headed for Seifer.

"Seifer! What are you doing here? It's only 10:30." She said as she sat beside him.

"I'm drowning my sorrrrrrrroooooooowwwwwssss." He said sorrows for a really long time and almost sang it.

"Uh, ya. Maybe you should go back to the garden. I jus finished my grocery shopping so I'll drive you back in your car." Rinoa offered, hoping that he would accept.

"Are you coming on to me?" Seifer asked and Rinoa nearly choked on her laughter. She held it in.

"No. I'm trying my hardest not to." She replied and he looked at her.

"You don't have to. I'm taller then Squall so it's ok if you like me. I also dated a lot of celebrities like...Tonya Upenberg, Tory Johnson and even George Tilikona." Rinoa laughed as he named all the popular singers. "Don't laugh. I'm serrios. I mean Serus, wait no its serious." Seifer struggled for words. He was on his 12 beer and he was losing it.

"Come on, I'll drive you home."

"No. I want to stay with you." Seifer said as he placed his hand on her knee. Rinoa moved back but Seifer quickly moved forward and pressed his lips hard against hers. He muffled Rinoa protest but he couldn't block her punch. She hit him as hard as she could in his gut and then jumped up to run as he fell back off his chair. She grabbed Seifer's keys and took them to the bartender.

"Don't give him anymore to drink unless it's coffee or water. Do not return these keys to him until tommorow morning. Here's money to put him up at the hotel. Don't let him know I did this, just tell him it's store policy. Got it?"

"Yes ma'am." The bartender replied. Rinoa nodded then and walked out of the bar. She thought she would be able to do it but now she knew she couldn't. All her grocery bags layed against the wall of the bar and now there seemed to be so many more of them. Rinoa walks to the pay phone that's beside the bar and calls a cab. She then grabs her grocery bags and goes to sit by the water to wait for her cab. While waiting she thought about Seifer and how he acted when he was drunk. Could he have been the one who almost raped Selphie? She wouldn't have suspected him to have done it but when he's drunk...That's when Rinoa's cab pulled up just above the stairs. She quickly grabbed her bags and ran upstairs and into the cab.

"Balamb garden and please step on it." Rinoa said. The cab driver nodded and took off.

Rinoa sat in the back still wondering. Could it have been Seifer?


	5. Keeping secrets

**Traumatized**

**Keeping Secrets**

Rinoa walked ackwardly down the hallway to Squall's dorm. One of the bags were starting to rip and she was using her hip to try and keep everything in the bag. When she finally got to the door she didn't know how she was going to knock. Her hands were full. She settle for kicking the door lightly. "Coming!" She heard Squall shout from somewhere in the room. He opened the door and quickly grabbed most of the bags from her. "Did you buy the whole grocery store?" He asked, surprised by how much she had bought.

"No." She said. "Between you and me we're going to need more food."

"If you say so. It's you who eats so much." Rinoa stuck her tongue out at him. "Oh ya. Quistis came by looking for you. She said to tell you to come by her dorm as soon as you got back. Apparently it's important."

"All right." Rinoa said. "You put these groceries away in the fridge." Squall groaned as he looked at all the bags. "And don't you dare just shove stuff everywhere! Put it where it goes." He smiled at the fact that she had just pretty much read his mind.

"Ya,ya. I will." Squall acted like it was such a big burden.

"Thanks, bye." Rinoa said as she walked out the door again. Rinoa started thinking about Seifer again. Maybe Quistis knows something! Rinoa thought excitedly and she quickened her pace. When she got to Quistis's room the door was already open so she just walked in. Quistis was dragging a garbage bag from her kitchen to the door so Rinoa ran over and help her put it into the garbage chute.

"You made it." Quistis said, out of breath still from her massively heavy garbage bag.

"Yup. Is there a problem?" Rinoa asked.

"Ya, sort of. Come in and sit down. This may take a while." Rinoa nodded and sat down on the couch beside Quistis. "Well you know how Seifer and I are dating?"

"Ya."

"Well we havn't really...we havn't done..."

"You havn't had sex yet?" Rinoa asked, trying to be helpful. Quistis was glad that Rinoa got it right away, unlike Seifer.

"Exactly. He thinks that I don't want to have sex with him but the truth is...I'm still a virgin. I'm not ready to have sex yet but I havn't told him that." Quistis said as fast as she could.

"Why didn't you tell him from the beginning?" Rinoa asked.

"It's Seifer. He's known for obssessing about sex. He's almost as bad as Irvine. I was afraid that if I told him that I was a virgin, he wouldn't be interested." Quistis bowed her head in shame. "I should have told him. You're right. Now he thinks I don't care about him and after our fight this morning-"

"You guys had a fight this morning?" That might explain why he was drunk so early, thought Rinoa.

"Yes. I said some pretty nasty things to him too." Quistis admitted.

"I think you should just tell him. He'll understand and he'll stop pressuring you." Rinoa suggested.

"How did you know that he was pressuring me?"

"His room is right by Squall's and he talks loud." Rinoa explained. "By the way, do you know where Seifer is right now?"

"No I don't. I havn't seen him since our fight. Why?" Quistis asked.

"No reason. Look I got to go back and make sure Squall hasn't done anything stupid with the groceries I just bought. Good luck with your problem. I hope my advice helps."

"I hope so too. Thanks." Quistis said as Rinoa walked out of Quistis's room and back down the hallway. So Quistis doesn't know about Seifer's early morning drunkeness, thought Rinoa. That could be bad.

Selphie sat on Zell's couch watching t.v but it was getting really boring. Nothing seemed to be on. You'd think they would play something on a friday afternoon but no. Selphie started to close her eyes to go to sleep but made herself open them again. She was too scared to go to sleep now. All she dreamed about was that night. She currently had huge, dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. Selphie heard a flushing sound and Zell walked out of the bathroom. "What 'cha watching?" Zell asked as he sat down beside her on the couch.

"I don't even know." Selphie replied, rubbing her eyes.

"You should probably go to sleep, Selphie." Zell advised.

"I don't want to. I'm not tired." Selphie replied.

"Try it again without the lying part this time." Zell said.

"I'm too scared. I keep dreaming about the same thing over and over again and I can't make it stop."

"I'll sleep with you if you want." Zell offered and Selphie's eyes widened. "I'll just hold you while you sleep. Hopefully I'll help you actually have a good dream." Zell said with a smile. Selphie thought about it. She was kind of scared at the prospect of Zell sharing the bed with her but it may just help with her dreams, and she was really tired.

"Ok." Selphie agreed as she got up off the couch. She quickly climbed into Zell's bed and he got in on the opposite side. She turned her back to him and he moved up behind her until their bodies were pressed together. He then wrapped his arm around her waist and she began to tremble.

"It's ok Selphie. I won't hurt you, I promise." Zell whispered quietly in her ear.

"I know." She whispered back. "It's not you, it's me." Zell pulled her closer and rested his chin on her head.

"Just know that you don't have to be afraid of me." Zell said gently.

"Thanks." Selphie said suddenly.

"For what?" Zell asked.

"For being you. For helping me out in my time of need, for letting me live with you, for being so patient and sweet and understanding..."

"Your welcome." Zell said. Selphie finally realized that Zell was right. She had nothing to fear of him. He had always protected her from everything. She turned so that her face was pressed to his chest and she snuggled in. She was glad that Zell cared enough about her to do this for her. She wrapped her arms around his waist and slowly fell asleep.

"What do you mean I can't have more beer?" Seifer demanded of the bartender. "I am a loyal customer now keep the beers coming."

"I'm sorry Seifer but I can't." The bartender said.

"I thought we were friends Lionel." Seifer said harshly.

"We are Seifer. I'm letting you drink under age aren't I? I can get my license taken away for that." Seifer just grumbled.

"I'm going home." Seifer said as he walked back to his table. "Where are my keys? My car is waiting for me!" Seifer had finally passed the slurring, dumb drunk stage and shot up to the mean, angry drunk stage.

"I have a place for you to stay tonight." Lionel said.

"I don't want to stay there unless there's sex and pretty girls that are naked and holding guitars." Seifer said.

"Uh, ya that's all there." Lionel agreed to Seifer's little freak fanatsy.

"Then I'm going! You can't stop me." Seifer cried indignantly. That's when the man Lionel called to take Seifer to the hotel came in.

"Is he ready to go?" The man asked.

"I'm going and you can't stop me!" Seifer cried again. Lionel nodded and the man helped Seifer out the door. They got in a golf cart and drove down to the hotel where the man had Seifer locked in his hotel room. He turned to the bell boy and said,

"Let him out when he's sober." Then the man walked away.


	6. Cries of passion

**Traumatized**

**Cries of Passion**

_"Zell, I need to tell you how I feel about you. I have hidden it for so long." Selphie said to Zell as they sat on his bed._

_"So tell me." _

_"Zell Dincht...I love you." Selphie whispered quietly as Zell let out a breath._

_"Thank God you said it first. I wanted to tell you for so long but I couldn't." Selphie smiled up at Zell and Zell leaned down to press a kiss against her mouth. He started to pull back when Selphie whispered,_

_"Don't stop." So Zell didn't. He pressed his mouth more firmly against hers and he ran his hands up and down her back. She arched into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Zell..." Zell pulled her on to his lap where he continued to kiss her. He slowly let his hands trail up and down her arms until he wanted more. Zell reached for the straps of her dress and started to pull them down from her shoulders. That's when it all went wrong. Suddenly Zell was pulling on her dress trying to get it off. He leaned close to her and his breath now smelled of beer. "Zell, stop." Selphie cried when Zell morphed into a hooded black thing. It was pulling at her dress, trying to get it off her body and it was breathing on her, the nasty smell of beer filling her senses. Selphie started screaming hoping that someone would come help her._

_"Zell, I need to tell you how I feel about you. I have hidden it for so long." Selphie said to Zell as they sat on his bed._

_"So tell me." _

_"Zell Dincht...I love you." Selphie whispered quietly as Zell let out a breath._

_"Thank God you said it first. I wanted to tell you for so long but I couldn't." Selphie smiled up at Zell and Zell leaned down to press a kiss against her mouth. He started to pull back when Selphie whispered,_

_"Don't stop." So Zell didn't. He pressed his mouth more firmly against hers and he ran his hands up and down her back. She arched into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Zell..." Zell pulled her on to his lap where he continued to kiss her. He slowly let his hands trail up and down her arms until he wanted more. Zell reached for the straps of her dress and started to pull them down from her shoulders. He got the dress down finally and sat leaned back to stare at her. She was even more beautiful then he imagined and now she was his. Selphie reached up and pulled his head back down to her mouth. Zell quickly shed his own clothes and layed naked with Selphie. He started touching her everywhere and she moaned and sighed each time his hands made contact with her skin. _

_"Are you ready Selphie?" Zell asked her before doing anything. Selphie nodded and Zell lifted himself up over her. He then entered her, thrusting fast to get the orgasm he so desperately wanted. Selphie started screaming and Zell smiled. Man, I'm good, thought Zell. Suddenly something kicked him in his side. _"Owww!" Zell said as he rubbed his side. Zell sat up in his bed and wondered what had just hit him. He looked over at Selphie and realized that the screaming and kicking was coming from her. He bent down and gently shook her shoulders. "Selphie, wake up. It's just a dream." Zell said as he shook her. Selphie's eyes shot open and Zell could see the fear in her eyes. Zell gently stroked her hair as she breathed really fast and deeply. "It's ok Selphie. It was just a dream." Selphie slowly started to breath normally again but the fear was still in her eyes. Suddenly she grabbed Zell's shirt in her fists and thrust her face into his chest and started sobbing. Zell wrapped his arms around her and kept telling her that everything would be all right. Selphie finally pulled away from him and looked up into his eyes.

Seifer walked down the hallway towards Quistis's room very slowly. If he walked too fast the room would start to spin. He had left the hotel and taken a cab home and he currently had the biggest hang over ever. He decided that he would send someone to go get his car later. He knocked on Quistis's door and then cringed because the sound of his own knocking was make his head pound harder. Quistis opened the door and looked at him angrily. She was going to demand where he had gone but he looked so bad that she changed her mind. She moved out of the way for him to come inside. Seifer stumbled until he finally got to her couch. He sat down and looked at her with his bloodshot eyes. "Hangover?" Quistis asked.

"Ya." Seifer whispered as he held his head. Quistis went into her bathroom and came out with two pills. She handed them to him with a glass of water.

"It will help." She said as she went to the kitchen to wet a cloth. She then sat down beside him on the couch and told him to lay down. Seifer just looked at her like he didn't understand. "Like this." She whispered as she gently guided him down until he laid with his head on her lap. She then took the cool cloth and put it across his forehead. "You went out drinking really early, didn't you?" Seifer nodded and then groaned at the pain he caused himself. Quistis shook her head. She took the cloth off his forehead and gently wiped his face. "I was worried about you." Quistis stated. Seifer tried to look at her but he couldn't. "I told you that I care. You just never believed me." Quistis reached down to pat his shoulder and he lifted his hand to grab hers.

"I did believe you." Seifer whispered very quietly. "I just wanted more then the emotional caring." Quistis put the cloth back on his forehead and looked at him. She wasn't sure if now was the right time to tell him the truth. If he got mad, it would hurt his head a lot.

"We need to talk." Quistis said to him.

"What about?" Seifer asked.

"I'll tell you when you're more fit to listen. In the mean time, go lay down in my bed. I'll make you soup and coffee." Quistis helped Seifer get up from his laying position and then she let him lean on her as she walked him to her room. She gently helped him to get under the sheets and then she leaned down and kissed his forehead like he was a little boy.

"Thanks." Seifer said softly.

"Your welcome." Quistis answered. She then walked out into the kitchen where she put soup and coffee on. Quistis tried to mentally prepare herself for when she would tell Seifer. She had a feeling that when she did, well there was going to be an explosion.


	7. Party planning

**Traumatized**

**Party Planning**

Zell gently started to pull down the straps of Selphie's dress when her whole body suddenly went taut. "Are you ok?" Zell asked gently.

"Ya, I'm fine." Selphie whispered. She then pulled down the straps on her own. She stood up and pulled the whole dress off until she was only clad in her bra and panties. Zell smiled his relief at her. He had been scared that she was going to run.

"You're so beautiful." Zell said as he leaned down to kiss her again, but this time she stopped him. Zell raised an eyebrow.

"You should take off your clothes too. It's only fair." Selphie said playfully. Zell liked the way she thought. So he quickly undid his belt and yanked down his pants. Then he pulled his shirt over his head.

"Happy?" He asked her, but she shook her head no. "Why not?"

"You're still wearing your boxers." Selphie stated.

"You're still wearing your bra and panties." Zell put emphasis on the word and. "I think you should take off at least one of them." So Selphie did. She undid her bra and threw it behind her. When Zell had pulled off his boxers she went to him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her back onto the bed. He pulled down her panties when she had layed down. He smiled at the view. Zell went into his washroom quickly and grabbed a condom. He put it on his nightstand for use when ready. Selphie gently cupped his cheek in her palm and looked into his eyes when he had layed back down beside her.

"I'm glad that I'm doing this with you." Selphie whispered.

"So am I." Zell said as he leaned down and took her mouth with his. While they were kissing he touched her evrywhere and she moaned against his mouth.

"Zell..." Zell got up and put on the condom, then he positioned himself between her legs.

"You're ready?" Zell asked. Selphie nodded and he slowly started to slid into her. At first Selphie thought everything was fine, until he reached her barrier. He bent down and kissed her hard as he pushed past it. She cried out and Zell swallowed her cries. He stopped once he was fully in her and looked down at her. "Are you ok? Do you want me to stop?" Zell asked gently as he stroked her cheek.

"No. Don't stop." She replied and started moving against him. Zell nodded and started thrusting, slowly at first but picking up speed. Soon they both came and fell back onto the bed.

"Selphie...You're something else." Zell whispered into her tangled hair. She smiled at him.

"So are you."

Rinoa had been sitting on the couch for a while and she didn't seem to be doing anything. Squall went and sat down beside her. "Everything ok?" Rinoa looked up in surprise. She hadn't even noticed him sit down beside her.

"Uh, ya." She said but Squall wasn't convinced.

"Are you sure?"

"I had a great idea." Rinoa said, getting off topic on purpose. "Let's have a party. I think it will help Selphie's recovery."

"You're joking right?" Squall asked.

"No, why?" Rinoa was confused. What was so wrong with throwing a party to get Selphie's mind off her problems.

"You must be deaf. Did you not hear the noises coming from Zell's room? I think she's already over it." Squall said with a snicker. Rinoa had been thinking so hard that she hadn't even heard the 'noises'.

"Then we'll throw a party to celebrate her and Zell...uh...Coming together." Rinoa said and Squall burst out laughing.

"If that's what you want. Where do you want the party to be?"

"The Quad. I'll go set up now. We'll have the party tonight. You go around and tell everyone." Squall nodded and headed for the phone. He decided to call Quistis first because Zell and Selphie may decided to...again.

"Hello?" Quistis answered on the first ring.

"Hey Quistis. It's Squall."

"What's up Squall?"

"Well, Rinoa wants to throw a party. She wants people to know and it would probably be a good idea if you went down to the Quad to help her out."

"All right. I'll tell Seifer."

"One more thing Quistis."

"Ya?"

"Tell Seifer to behave."

"I will." Quistis said with a laugh. "Bye Squall."

"Bye." Squall hung up the phone and came to the conclusion that he had to call Zell and Selphie sometime.

"Hello?" Zell answered on the fourth ring and he was a little breathless.

"Hey Zell." Squall answered trying to cover up his laugh with a cough.

"What's up?"

"Rinoa wants to throw a party tonight. It's going to be on the Quad. Both you and Selphie are invited. The two of you should probably head down to the Quad now and help out with the preperations."

"Ok. Thanks for the invite. We'll just get dress- I mean take a shower...Uh...Seperately and then head down to help." Zell stuttered.

"Whatever." Squall said with a laugh. "See ya Zell."

"Bye." The next little while was spent calling everyone Squall knew to invite them to the party. He had invited at least fifty people who were going to invite friends so this party was going to be big. Squall wondered if he should invite Irvine. They hadn't really talked to him in a while but he was still there friend. Squall picked up the phone and got a weird feeling in his stomach. What the hell? Squall thought. He decided to just ignore it.

"Talk to me." Irvine answered.

"Hey Irvine. It's Squall. Listen, Rinoa's having a party tonight. You're invited to come if you want."

"Thanks. I'll be there. Do you need any help setting up?"

"Not anymore. We have more help then we need. Thanks for the offer though."

"No prob."

"See you then."

"Bye Squall." Squall hung up the phone and looked at it. For some reason the feeling in his stomach got worse.

"I better not be getting sick." Squall mumbled as he walked out of the room and headed for the Quad. He might as well help out.


	8. The act of trust

**Traumatized**

**The Act Of Trust**

"What?" Zell asked as Selphie's eyes filled with tears. Selphie shook her head sadly.

"Nevermind." She said quietly. "It's dumb."

"Nothing you say is dumb." Zell reassured her. Selphie looked at hims closely then decided that he was sincere. She would tell him.

"I don't think that I can ever love anyone again. The physical is too scary and the emotional..."

"That's not true. You'll find someone who you trust enough to be with." Zell told her gently, wishing that that person would be him.

"There is one guy, but he only thinks of me as a friend." Selphie said sadly and Zell's insides jumped. Damn it, thought Zell. She had already found someone.

"Who is it?" Zell asked hesitantly.

"It doesn't matter." Selphie replied sadly. "We're just friends."

"Yes, it does." Zell said as he started to get frustrated. Please God, don't let it be Irvine, Zell prayed. Selphie looked at him again with huge eyes and he was scared of her answer.

"It's you." She said simply. Zell mouth opened and his eyes widened. He was so shocked that his dream had come true that he couldn't say anything. That was a mistake. Selphie took it in a bad way and spun on her heel as tears splashed down her cheeks. She ran to the door crying and had her hand on the door knob when Zell grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Why are you crying?" Zell asked, confused. Selphie doesn't answer but in her head she's screaming, because you don't love me! Selphie pulls back and Zell let's her go. Zell finally got the words out that he was waiting for, "I'm honored that you trust me so much." Selphie doesn't move.

"You are?" She asked quietly.

"Of course I am." Zell replied. "I never thought that you'd feel that way about me." Selphie finally turned to face Zell.

"What do you mean?" Selphie looked up to him as she spoke. Zell was suddenly very shy and wasn't ready to admit his true feelings to Selphie.

"I'm glad you trust me." Zell then opens his arms for her to walk into them. He gently held her to him and kissed her hair. She lifted her head so that he would kiss her lips, which he did. She opened his mouth with her tongue almost immediately. Zell loved her eagerness, he gently tugged her back towards his bed while they kissed.

"Zell...I don't know what to do." Selphie whispered.

"I'll help you." Zell answered.

"But you're a virgin too...Or did you lie?" Selphie asked.

"No I didn't lie. But Squall...Well I'll help you." Selphie smiled at the mention of Squall. the last person you'd ever think was a sex addict. To be honest, it was surprising that Rinoa was one too.

"Ok." Selphie said as she layed down on his bed. Zell layed beside her and started kissing her again.

Quistis walked back to the kitchen with Seifer's dirty dishes. She was going to wash them when Seifer called her back, "Quistis, please come here for a sec." Quistis sighed softly then walked into her room where Seifer had sat up on the bed. He patted the spot beside him, letting her know that he wanted her to sit there. Quistis sat down gingerly and looked at him.

"Yes?" She asked. Seifer just stared at her. "Seifer?"

"I just want to look at you." He answered. After a long moment of his staring, Quistis started to get nervous.

"Seifer..." She said quietly.

"I love you." Seifer said unexpectedly. Quistis just gaped at him.

"What did you say?" Quistis asked, worrying that she had heard him wrong.

"I love you." Seifer repeated. Quistis finally let it sink in and her eyes lit up. She jumped into his arms and he held her close. "I'm sorry for taking so long to realize it." Sifer said as she nuzzled her neck.

"I love you too, Seifer." Quistis responded. "But I have a confession to make."

"What?" Seifer asked, praying that she wouldn't say that she loved someone else too.

"I'm a...a...virgin." She whsipered. Seifer eyes widened with relief. That was it? He thought.

"That's it?" Seifer needed to make sure.

"Ya."

"Why didn't you just tell me before?" Seifer asked.

"I was scared you wouldn't like me because I wasn't experienced enough for you." She said as she dropped her head. Seifer reached for her chin and lifted her head.

"I love you even more now." He whispered to her and she smiled.

"Thanks." She replied as she leaned closer for a kiss.

"Anytime." He replied jsut before placing his lips on hers. Quistis pushed Seifer backwards so that he was lying down on the bed and she was on top of him. She kissed him harder and he opened her lips for his tongue to slip in. Quistis then pulled away, gasping. There was one more thing she had to clear up.

"You won't go on anymore morning drinking binges, will you?"

"Nope. I promise." Seifer told her.

"Did you ever go with anyone else?" Quistis asked, remembering that she had told him to go sleep with one of the garden whores. She started to get jealous at the thought of him going drinking with a girl.

"Only Irvine." He replied.

"Good." She smiled. "Now go take a shower." She told him. Seifer groaned but got up and walked towards the bathroom. "Here are some towels." Quistis handed him tow towels.

"Thanks." Seifer said as he finally entered the bathroom and closed the door. Quistis was so excited about her new found love that she had to tell someone. Sh epicked up the phone and dialed Rinoa's number.

"Hello?" Squall answered.

"Hey Squall. Is Rinoa around?" Quistis asked. He replied ya and called for her. She heard Squall tell Rinoa that she was on the phone.

"Hey Quisits. What's up?"

"Nothing much. Seifer just told me that he loves me." Quistis tried to sound casual.

"Oh my God! Really?" Rinoa asked excitedly.

"Really!" Quistis answered.

"So no more drinking binges for him?"

"Nope." Quistis answered. "Can you believe I was jealous for a second when I asked him who he went with to drink. I thought for sure that it would be a girl."

"Who was it?" Rinoa asked curiously. She tried to think of a guy who would drink with Seifer.

"Irvine." Well that surprised Rinoa.

"I didn't know Irvine drank." Rinoa said.

"Neither did I. Oh! I have to go. Seifer just got out of the shower."

"Ok. Bye." Rinoa said as she sat down on her couch. Irvine drank? She thought. I could've sworn he said he didn't, Rinoa continued to think. Something inside her head was trying to come to light but it wouldn't. Something about Irvine. What was it?


End file.
